Do my shoes make me look fat


While at the mall the other day, I overheard the daughter who was trying on school shoes ask her mother if they made her feet look fat.

When buying a pair of shoes, I’m looking at style, but mostly comfort, price, but mostly comfort, color, but mostly comfort, in other words, comfort. Whether or not they make my feet look fat, slim or sexy is not the concern. The question is “can I walk a mile in them?” Well, the question might be more like “can I get through the supermarket without my little toe hurting?

The person asking her mother the question was a typical middle school girl in cute little shorts and a cute little top that showed off a cute little body with about as much fat as I have on my little toe. The only fat this child got close and personal with would be French fries.

In a world where obesity in our youth reigns king and queen, concern over fat feet shows the other end of the spectrum. I have never traveled to that side. If I buy a pair of black shoes, it is not because black is thinning or that is slenderizes my arch. Black simply goes with nearly everything in my closet.

I’m told by the daughter of a friend, I obviously don’t get it.

The feet, she tells me, should be of major concern when considering appearance. Fat feet, she said, is just the beginning. Soon fat cells spread to the ankles, up to the thighs, over the hips, never ending until they reach the earlobes and turning them pudgy. As I listened, I couldn’t help but touch the tips of my ears. They did feel pudgy.

Since that conversation, I have a new look on life. I shall forget about recipes featuring kale, miracle creams and killing pushups and concentrate on shoes that slim my little toe and all that comes after.

Even Cinderella knew that a shoe could rid her of the plump pumpkin and turn her into a princess.


Joyce Ore

Joyce Ore writes delightful stories about life with a dose of humor and sprinkle of nostalgia. Her column appears Saturday in the Tribune.

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